How To Only Fall For Emotionally Unavailable Men

1.     Make sure the relationship is doomed from the start. Whether he’s freshly out of a serious relationship, lives in another Country, or best yet, is a total sleaze that flirts with anything that moves, behold! That’s your man.

2.     Ignore all the red flags. Oh, he’s never been able to commit? Perfect opportunity to tell yourself you’re going to be the one to change him. Because that always works out in the end.

3.     Convince yourself that his indecisiveness is just temporary. I mean, he’s totally going to see how wifey material you are one day and then everything will change. Right?

4.     Ask all your friends if his wishy washy behavior is normal. Proceed to believe it’s acceptable behavior despite the fact that all your friends tell you to run.

5.     Have DTR talks on the regular. Never get anywhere. Continue to date him.

6.     When he grows distant, put in more effort because you are a team and it’s just your turn to play right now... And for the last two months.

7.     Have periods of being in a happy stable relationship. Then immediately be reminded you are not in a relationship when you see him flirting with other girls.

8.     Start feeling awkward when people ask if you’re single. Are you single?

9.     Grow impatient and ask why he doesn’t want a relationship. Listen to him go on a spiel about how he’s just not ready but really likes you and blah blah blah blah. Totally fall for it.

10.  Keep seeing him until A.) You eventually grow a backbone and realize you deserve way better. Or (more likely) B.) Wait till he freaks out about getting too close and leaves you.

11. Convince yourself you're never going to fall for another emotionally unavailable man again. 

12. Repeat steps 1-12