I’ve been trying to write my Resolutions blog post for almost two weeks now. I mean, yes. I could blame it on the fact my parents are staying with me and we have been busy drinking wine and reorganizing my entire kitchen, but it’s more than that. I’ve developed feelings and I don’t know what to do about it.

Remember that scene in The Grinch, when all of a sudden his heart grows three sizes bigger and he’s just a ball of sunshine? That’s unfortunately me right now. So because my heart is on crack and I can’t finish my resolutions, I’ve decided to post this for you instead.

10 Things That Happen When You Like Someone

1.     You think about them all the time. It’s quite annoying actually. There you are, minding your own business, brushing your cats alone in your apartment while finishing off that last drop of Champagne and BAM, you think about a joke they made two weeks ago and laugh. To yourself. Alone in your apartment. Like a total psychopath.

2.     You start having text conversations that are now too embarrassing to show your friends. It used to be funny to show your girlfriends how you give zero fucks and have no problem taking a month to respond to that one guy who continues to invite you out for drinks, even though it’s been four months and you only went on two dates. But now here you are, sending emojis up the wahzoo, writing novels about your feelings.

3.     You actually talk about feelings. A lot. And you’re weirdly into it.

4.     Their name is pretty much word vomit at this point. It’s like you’re waiting for a certain topic to come up just so you can somehow tie it back to them and be like, “OMG Chad likes chocolate cake too. That’s so crazy!” No, it’s not crazy and no one asked. Yet you continue to do this on the reg.

5.     You tell them everything you’re doing throughout the day. Even when you’re just going to the grocery store or laying on your couch, watching Trisha Paytas have another mental breakdown. And they do the same. Like why do I want to know what you’re having for dinner? No idea. But I do. Also send pics.

6.     You change their name in your phone to something that feels more personal. Whether that means adding their middle name, an emoji, or a funny nickname. You’ve definitely tweaked this at least once since catching feelings. Don’t lie.

7.     You think you’re chill until some girl comments on their IG photo and all of a sudden you’re like who is this girl, where does she live, and is she prettier than me?! Then you immediately stop yourself because you sound like a total nutcase and all she commented was “cool!” under his sunset pic, which was, in fact, pretty cool.

8.     You start listening to happy songs. Like all the time. Car rides now consist of you full on belting to Keith Urban’s “Somebody Like You.”

9.     You sometimes pull up a picture of them just to look at it. Like a total predator. You’ve 100% seen this picture before. Yet here you are, in the dark, staring at a 2013 pic of him at, what appears to be a friend’s lake house, laughing off into the distance, that his mom probably took on her iphone.

10. You’re up at 1:30AM still thinking about this person, so you decide to write an entire Blog post about it.

There you have it. Shout out to my crazy people with feelings!

xo

Renee