What You're Thinking When He's Not Texting Back
Now I don’t know about you, but I’m all about overthinking. If someone were to write a book on how to overthink absolutely everything in life, it would be me. Give me a conclusion, I’ll jump to it. If you don’t believe me, let’s go through my thought process when a guy I like doesn’t respond to my text within one hour.
Let’s say I send him “Hey” at 3:25pm. This is how the rest of the hour goes, inside my head.
3:26pm
I’m sure he’s just busy and not looking at his phone. No problem, I’m patient.
3:27pm
Still nothing. He’s probably just working right now.
3:30pm
Is he charging his phone?
3:45pm
Maybe he IS dating that girl in that photo he was tagged in 36 weeks ago. Ugh, I knew it.
3:55pm
Let’s just check and see if he’s active on social media. I doubt he is, but at least then I’ll know for sure he’s just busy. Which I’m sure he totally is.
3:56pm
Okay, that’s weird. Five minutes ago he liked 3 photos on Instagram.
3:57pm
Wait, who’s Shelby? I guess he’s too busy liking pictures of her on vacation to notice my super fun conversation starter that only took 25 minutes, three friends, and a glass of wine to craft.
4:00pm
I bet my “hey” came off desperate and clingy so now he’s just never going to talk to me again.
4:03pm
I don’t even care! Honestly, I have better things to do then worry about this.
- Receives new text message –
OH MY GOD, YES OKAY, EVERYTHING IS FINE… just kidding it’s my mom.
4:10pm
I’m going to post a hot selfie on Instagram just so he can see what he’s missing. I mean, sure, Shelby has a perfect bikini body and a natural glow to her skin that makes it look like she's wearing highligher even when she's not, but I'm a solid 8.5. Sometimes even a 9 in certain lighting.
4:12
Well, he’s active on Facebook chat. I guess it’s safe to say he hates me and never wants to speak to me again.
4:14
Like what, does he just hate fun people? Maybe I'm too fun for him and he’s intimidated.
4:20
Maybe it’s because the last time I talked to him, I mentioned that I had cats and it freaked him out. He probably thinks my only friends are my cats and no one likes me.
4:25
You know what? I don’t need this. I have a great job, two cats that adore me, three seasons left of that Netflix show I started, and a half bottle of Prosecco in the fridge. I’m fine. Honestly? I’m happy he didn’t text me. I’m too busy for a relationship anyways.
4:30
-Guy texts back-
Nevermind!